Nintendo released a demo today to its upcoming football match, Mario Strikers: Battle League. How does it play? Is it a worthy follow-up to the older games? Is it fun? These are questions to which I have no answer. What I can tell you is that in this latest game, Waluigi retains his crown as the king of swagger, with his penchant for weird poses with roses that look completely intact.
Mario Strikers: Battle League developed by Next Level Games and released June 23 for Switch. This is the third game in Attackers series, and plays various Mario characters who take their conflict out on the field to play football together, complete with special moves and wild animations. But let’s get to the real reason many of you are here: Waluigi’s amazing victory animations.
First of all, here’s Waluigi’s amazing stroll after scoring a goal:
I first discovered these wonderful animations thanks to Twitter user @ElliotDubywho cut them off new demo gameplay footage shared by NintendoLife.
There’s more effervescent where it came from. This is what happens when Nintendo’s resident weird, tall guy wins a battle:
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Dude just walks away, as if he owns the world, and yes, in that moment, in that field, surrounded by god-knows-what-pops-up-for-these-things, I think he owns the world. He’s the king, and he’s back, honey.
Oh, and just calm down. To all of you sick out there who love something sexy Waluigi x rose actionNintendo has surprisingly covered you with this alternative scoring animation:
It seems he is recreating infamous (and erotic) “rose bag” rendition that appeared last year apparently for no reason at all. It felt like someone deep inside Nintendo made it, saved it and then on their last day of work uploaded it to the web so everyone could see it. To the person that I have found on completely in this blog, I say thank you. For now, we have Waluigi recreating the ingenious flex of a brand new Nintendo game.
You know, all this amazing Waluigi action just reminds me that it should be a literal crime that the purple prince of eyeball graffiti continues to be omitted by the ongoing Smash Bros. franchise. Look at these animations, the amazing stiff, the intense rose action, and tell me he should not be in the center Super Smash Bros.
And do not give me any shit about “rules” and how he behaved in trophy form or whatever. If a nerd likes Minecraft’s Steve can join Super Smash Bros. Ultimate, so can Waluigi, aka the human-personification-of-the-noise-you-make-when-you-pop-a-zit. He’s playing football again, for which I’m grateful. But he should also be involved in Nintendo’s big fights. He deserved it. That’s only fair.